The Echo of Absence - Grief
“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen.” Elisabeth Kübler-Ross
Grief can lead us to unknown, lonely places. Whilst everyone experiences loss in their own way, it often feels like a journey we must walk alone, no matter how much love and support we have. Even with caring friends, family, and people who want to help carry the weight of our pain, the grief in our hearts can still feel overwhelming. Though we can reach out for support, the journey through loss is deeply personal, and many days, it’s a path we must find our own way through.
Grief is a natural response to loss. It’s the emotional suffering you feel when something or someone you love is taken away. Often, the pain of that loss can feel daunting. You may experience all kinds of difficult and unexpected emotions, from shock or anger to disbelief, guilt, and profound sadness. No one can really say that what they’re going through is worse than what you’re feeling, and no one can truly know how you feel unless they've been through something similar themselves. Even then, everyone’s journey with grief is different. We each experience it in our own way, and it's important to remember that your pain is yours, and it's real to you.
Grief is something we all face in many forms—whether through the loss of a loved one, a pet, or a dream, through changes like moving away, the end of a relationship, or the loss of a job. It can come with the quiet sadness of growing older, facing health challenges, or navigating a family breakdown. Grief can also stem from losses that are hard to name—like the fading of a connection, the absence of peace, or the sorrow of unfulfilled hopes. Whatever the cause, grief is deeply human and touches us all in unique and profound ways.
Grief knocks on everyone’s door at some point in our lives. We may feel we are strong enough - we have got this, we will deal with it when it arises as we have the strength, we can shut out the feelings if it’s too much or even feel like we have the capacity to bounce back quicker than most others, yet it’s hard for the grief journey meanders and has twists, turns and many obstacles. When we face a loss, we often find ourselves walking down a path we never expected, one that feels unfamiliar and full of uncertainty. The journey can seem heavy and devastating, with moments of deep sadness. Grief is complex—it can feel painful, raw, sacred, and even strangely beautiful at times. Accepting the loss can be incredibly difficult, but the grieving process isn’t something we can rush. It’s about being present with our emotions, allowing the pain to come and go, and letting our grief have its voice. Trying to shut it out only makes it harder, and more distant from our hearts.
In my grief and having a faith I have asked many questions and bargained with God. I wonder if you have. Questions ranging from: Lord why must I go through this? Why are you not answering me? Have you turned your back on me? I have found in the depths of my bargaining with God, in my own lamenting and in trying to understand my deep sadness I find strength in the Book of Psalms. King David’s grief is expressed all through it:
Psalms 25:16-17: “Turn Yourself to me, and have mercy on me, For I am desolate and afflicted. The troubles of my heart have enlarged; Bring me out of my distresses!”
Psalm 13:1-2: “…How long will you hide your face from me? How long must I wrestle with my thoughts and day after day have sorrow in my heart? …”
Grief is a chance to let God comfort and heal us. If you’re supporting a grieving friend, sometimes the best thing you can do is just listen and be there. You don’t need to fix anything, just offer your kind presence. It’s enough.
My faith informs me that Jesus understands my grief because He has felt it Himself. When He was on the cross, He experienced the deepest sorrow, separated from His Father. He knows the weight of pain, the loneliness, and the longing for comfort. He didn’t just witness suffering—He lived through it, and because of that, He is able to walk alongside us in our own moments of sorrow.
Grief can leave us asking, “Where do I go from here?” When the pain feels overwhelming, where do you turn for comfort, and how do you let yourself grieve in a way that invites healing? Take a moment today to check in on those who may be grieving. Don’t try to fix anything—just offer your presence and let them know you care.